My grandfather died sometime this evening.
He was unconscious in the hospital for a long time, and even for years before that, his health had never been much good.
At first, he responded minutely to stimulus; twitching of the fingers, and such. But after some days, he ceased to do that.
His family, back in HK, had been told today that his hearbeat had gone from 40 down to 30. He'd been having heart problems while unconscious - doctors had said the level of enzymes signified that he'd probably had a stroke. He had told no one about it, perhaps because he felt he'd be nagged/etc by his wife (my grandmother) or other members of the family.
He claimed to be a believer. I truly hope he was.

I wonder about the timing of the following things, in chronological order (1 and 2 might be the wrong way around):
1. VoIP service/equipment that we acquired for free calls to/from HK
2. Dad losing his job due to the company going broke
3. Mum's increase work hours
4. News of grandfather's unconscious state, resulting in dad flying back to HK. Tickets were acquired on the day, from a rather sympathetic agent who said we could pay later.
5. HSC
6. My sudden influx of students to accompany for exams
7. Grandfather's death

Maybe I'm looking too deeply. But it doesn't hurt to think and consider. The timing is remarkably good.
1 was not too bad in the way of cost. We had to pay for the entire year.
2 happened after we paid off 1.
3 allowed paying off of 4.
4 allows my brother to study in peace for 5.
1 also means that it was easy to keep up with the situation of 4, without the added stress of 'Oh no, it's overseas calling best keep the conversation short'. I've noticed mum spends a lot of time on the phone. I could estimate that the number of calls in the last few weeks to/from HK have (understandably) outnumbered the sum of calls to/from in the last few months.

I've no idea why 6 is happening. At the moment I see it is a blessing for being willing to give part of what I've earned to the One who deserves the credit. Perhaps it is encouragement to do better at following Him. Well, now there is a good environment for trying to follow Him better; tragedy has never cut me deeply (yet - after all, I've always known that people die), but it does affect those around me.

In any case, the future is looking grim, but I don't feel bad. Sombre mood, maybe, but I don't really feel anything. I didn't know my grandfather very well; when I was in HK some 6yrs ago, he stayed in his room most of the time, and didn't say much.
I am sure my relatives in HK feel differently. Perhaps dad even wants to come back sooner, for the support of closer family, but part of me hopes (selfishly?) he stays in HK until the HSC is over. He is somewhat disruptive to study...

These are my feelings today, several hours after the death of my grandfather.
Let no one else say that I should feel differently. Particularly my mother. For my emotions are mine, and no one else's.